Weaning off Lexapro: Day 40

Meds:

  • 10mg Lexapro, normal thyroid meds
  • electrolyte beverage
  • a little bit of walking

Symptoms:

  • Fretting over my current relationship with bf
  • UPDATE: A symptom I’ve been forgetting to mention but have been experiencing for a couple of weeks: a strange, warm, fuzzy feeling in my stomach. It’s very unusual for me. It’s almost like, a positive, warm fuzzy happy feeling? It’s really weird.
  • UPDATE: The acid reflux stuff seems to have eased off

Journal Items:

  • Got up for an appointment with a course professor at 9am
  • Went for a walk afterward
  • Ate breakfast/lunch at a cafeteria type place
  • Went to a library to focus on my studies
  • Kind of frittered away time once I got back home
  • Watching horse videos online and some stuff on learning disorders
  • Wrote an extremely long email to relationship counselor (she’s already replied; she’s very nice and makes me feel hopeful)
  • Ate dinner late (9pm)
  • Getting ready for bed

Weaning off Lexapro: Days 31-39

It’s hard to know if I’m off by a day but it hasn’t mattered because I haven’t gone down by any more yet. I’m still holding steady at 10mg of Lexapro because I had gotten sick and didn’t want to make any changes at that point. But, my sickness has passed, aside from a random cough. Perhaps I will go down to the 5mg either tomorrow morning or the next day. We’ll see.

In the meanwhile, the meds have stayed the same:

  • 10mg Lexapro, normal thyroid meds
  • vitamins, somewhat rarely this week (keep forgetting)
  • lots and lots of walking
  • I’ve started to drink electrolyte beverages again, and I think it’s made a big difference in how I feel
  • the last 2 or so nights, a little bit of clonazepam

Symptoms:

  • A LOT of frustration
  • A LOT of irritation
  • A lot of feeling like I want to quit Accounting
  • When I was sick, some light-headedness and some electric zappies

Journal Items:

  • There’s no way for me to remember the week past, but I remember a smattering:
  • Pokémon Community Day was awesome and fantastic exercise
  • I have received a Pokémon Go EX raid pass (big deal)
  • My last Pokémon Go walk with my friend, “Joe”, went well
  • I finally own rain boots (as of today)
  • I hate the Apple company with a burning passion right now (on that note, don’t schedule any appointments with them via online right now. Only do it by telephone. I won’t go into details, but if you do it online and then go there, you will have wasted your time and money)
  • I’ve been frustrated. A lot.
  • I’ve studied some. Need to study more.
  • I’ve walked A LOT

Weaning off Lexapro: Days 28, 29, 30

Sadly, you can tell that my interests are starting to cycle again already. I can’t even make myself journal here consistently. I wish I knew how to prevent this process.

All 3 of these days, I’ve had the same meds:

  • 10mg Lexapro (crazy); normal thyroid meds
  • 10mg Zyrtec
  • multivite
  • Day 28: minimal exercise (walking)
  • Day 29: a good amount of walking
  • Day 30: lots of walking

Symptoms:

  • I’ve had a cold
  • I’ve been cranky
  • a little reflux at night still
  • OCD thoughts as I try to sleep

Journal Items:

Eh, I’ve no idea. Day 28: Meh? Day 29: Walking but very slowly (I was pretty sick; I even skipped my Pokewalk day). Day 30: Volunteer work for most of the day. Yay. A little Pokemon stuff. I dunno. I don’t feel super, emotionally. Oh hey, I need to sign up at the local college again. I’ve decided that’s what’s going to save me and put me back onto a schedule again. I need to do that approximately…right now.

Weaning off Lexapro: Days 25, 26, 27

Sunset with colors of yellow, pink, and a lot of blue

Sunset this evening

I’m a little behind. Meds:

  • On each of these days, 10mg Lexapro, multivite if I remembered (I did today, the 27th day, for sure).
  • Exercise in the form of gentle bicycle rides on all 3 days.
  • I’ve also been taking 10mg Zyrtec.

Symptoms:

  • Coughing, sneezing (head cold), mild sore throat
  • reflux still, maybe not as bad
  • kind of testy yesterday and today
  • tired

Journal Items:

  • 2 days ago, I don’t recall. I know there was studying. Gentle bicycling
  • 1 day ago, I went on 2, gentle bicycle rides
  • Today, I went on a long, gentle bicycle ride with lots of stopping (Pokémon-related)
  • I finished the previous class and have started the new class
  • Bf and I had couples therapy yesterday and it was really helpful. I wish I weren’t so damn cranky today but I woke up feeling yucky and it stayed that way until I went on my bike ride.
  • Riding my bike, I felt instantly better. I felt wonderful so long as I was riding my bicycle. Outside. In the trees. And the sun.
  • It feels hard here right now, like everyone has tread on everyone else’s toes a little bit. Sometimes living with others is very hard.

Weaning off Lexapro: Day 24

Very swirly white clouds on a blue sky and the tips of some trees

Swirly clouds from 2015

Meds Today:

  • 10mg Lexapro; norm. thyroid meds
  • multivite chewables
  • exercise (bicycling; walking)

Symptoms:

  • gas and intestinal pain
  • coughing (allergies, I think)

Journal Items:

  1. Bf brought me coffee in bed at 7am; I drank it closer to 7:30, I think
  2. I know I was out of bed by 9ish
  3. I started my new study plan for the new class
  4. I met people for a Pokémon Go raid and that was fun
  5. I went bicycling for about two hours, although I didn’t go very far (I went slowly and took many stops for Pokémon and views)
  6. I studied
  7. I walked, saw another Dr. Who, walked again for a Pokégym
  8. Bedtime

Weaning off Lexapro: Day 23

Photo of a snail in the rain

Pretty snail today

Meds Today:

  • 10mg Lexapro; normal thyroid meds
  • Calcium-Mag-Zinc tablet
  • lots of exercise (walking all day)

Symptoms:

  • Maybe not as smooth socially (face too readable?)
  • none really
  • still having acid reflux or something every night (which is new for me)

Journal Items:

  • Today was Pokéwalk day with my friend, “Joe”
  • First, I took and passed a Final Exam
  • Then, I went to an outdoor shop in search of rubber rain boots but no luck
  • Then, Pokéwalk. This time, bf’s mom joined, too
  • Halfway through, we ran into another Pokémon player that I’ve known for a while now and is super nice
  • We all 4 walked quite a while
  • 4 became 3 became 2
  • (I was stressed at times because I worry about peace and harmony and “Joe’s” feet, and everyone being happy, and blah blah blah) I’m still de-stressing from that aspect
  • I walked extra once I got home, since my socks were completely soaked anyway
  • Dinner; Dr. Who; now it’s bedtime and it’s quite late and … the usual, I guess

Weaning off Lexapro: Day 22

Dark sunset clouds with purple and bright pink and some orange

Sunset tonight

Meds Today:

  • 10mg Lexapro; norm. thyroid meds
  • multivite (possibly two, actually)
  • minimal exercise (walking)

Symptoms:

  • None really
  • I’ve been forgetting to mention something like acid reflux nearly every night, which is unusual for me

Journal List:

  • Got up all right, had breakfast
  • Went to a quick Pokémon Go raid, chatted briefly with people
  • Studied
  • Dr. Who
  • Studied / Took my pre-assessment and passed
  • Dr. Who
  • Studied. Bedtime

Weaning off Lexapro: Day 21

Blue sky with several different types of clouds

Clouds from a year ago

Meds Today:

  • 10mg Lexapro; norm. thyroid meds
  • multivite chewables; calcium?
  • EDIT: some walking exercise

Symptoms:

  • not much
  • my face is becoming more read-able?? This isn’t a good thing! When I was really disappointed about something this evening, someone could read it who can’t normally read it, and I prefer to hide such things!
  • in and out of reality / surrealness just a few times

Journal Items:

  • Got out of bed kind of late (after 11:30 maybe??)
  • Breakfast
  • Ran to get a Pokémon a couple of blocks away but I was too late
  • Tried to study; got distracted. Repeat x 1,000
  • Vacuumed a little, laundry, mopped the kitchen due to a sugar spill or something, hung something on a wall
  • Dinner
  • Studied a tiny bit
  • Chatted with another Pokémon Go player online; now getting ready for bed (a bit late)

Weaning off Lexapro: Day 20

Blue sky and very swirly, white clouds in frame

Clouds from 2015

Meds Today:

  • 10mg Lexapro (I still just can’t believe it); normal thyroid meds
  • fish oil capsule
  • calcium-magnesium-zinc tablet
  • exercise (walking, a tiny bit of jogging)

Symptoms:

  • I SLEPT IN FOR A LONG TIME
  • Felt emotionally neutral
  • Felt good while walking
  • Mild brain zappies when turning my head
  • Brief anxiety (maybe 5 min)
  • UPDATE: I forgot to mention the nausea after eating, and some reflux

Journal Items:

  1. I was SO TIRED. I slept in very late; maybe getting up at about 1pm?
  2. I ate breakfast then, and immediately outside to play Pokémon Go with a group of people I hadn’t seen since before the holidays (they’re so nice)
  3. Then I tried to study but didn’t focus well
  4. I walked again (it feels SO GOOD to walk, even though I had a long phase where if I turned my head, I got mild brain zappies; it’s within manageable ranges so far, though)
  5. I tried to study again
  6. I ate dinner (early enough to prevent reflux, hopefully)
  7. Now I’m finally studying fairly well, but it’s closing in on bedtime and writing here is part of my “sleep hygiene” routine, so here I am.