No longer getting out of bed

Well, believe it or not, there are some pluses and some negatives.

The biggest negative is probably that I’m no longer getting out of bed without assistance. Another negative is that I haven’t located external assistance yet, so my bf is getting the brunt of this at present. It’s not too cool, let me tell you.

But a pro is that I’m now a jogger. Haha. I started jogging 2 days ago but I’m determined. I don’t care if I only manage to jog for 3 minutes a day so long as I do it. Even if my only goal is to make it to the icecream shop not too far away and eat a cup of icecream so that jogging will result in weight gain. I don’t care right now, as long as I’m doing it.

I’m practicing piano nearly every day and a little bit of voice exercises as well. I’m still mostly just learning how to read the bass clef notes, but whatever. It’s really fun. Just let everyone else wear earplugs for a while so I can practice.

The semester is winding out but alas, I no longer recall the last time I attended either of my morning classes. This is pretty sad. It’s a big disappointment for me. I was doing so well for so long into the semester but I feel like I am too tired to get out of bed in the morning. And even if I get out of bed, if I’m alone I just sit there and don’t do anything and eventually fall back asleep. Even if I’m just sitting on the floor putting on my socks or something, I’ll run out of steam to move a muscle.

So I don’t know. I tried cutting my own hair the other day; it just hit me that my hair was too long and heavy and making me feel tired. Now it looks pretty silly but oh well, it’ll grow out.

I’m trying to eat slightly less now too, since I’m so unhappy with the weight gain.

Well okay, back to studying. Oh PS I didn’t get the job. I interviewed and did all right but I did bungle one of the most important questions they had for me. It turned out I got cold feet during the interview because part of what would have been my responsibility was to give IV’s to animals and also teach other recruits how to give IVs. I don’t honestly know if I am capable of inserting a needle into an animal. I don’t know if I could. So I got cold feet and never wrote them a follow-up thank you or anything at all.

If I can make it through the rest of this semester, I believe I can have a job as a tutor here next semester. But I need to do well in this class. Two more weeks or so and I need to maintain an A but I’m failing at getting out of bed. This is hard. = I make this hard.

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One thought on “No longer getting out of bed

  1. I think even if you had aced the interview you would have needed to turn down the job because it requires you to do something you are not comfortable doing (though that could change with experience). I listen to you being unable to get out of bed to do well in your last few classes and wonder why you might be afraid of success. It seems that for the accounting, you have no difficulty in mastering this subject. (If you succeed at accounting, it doesn’t mean you become a failure again because you don’t succeed at everything* else….) I don’t think I could put a needle in an animal either; nor am I much good at accounting. But there are other things I do well enough. I hope you will allow yourself to do well at those things you do well.

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