Initial note: I slept in today’s clothes last night. It was very uncomfortable. I didn’t sleep well. But it was a success. I only delayed in bed for 1 hour before getting up and heading to work.
So, in light of some of my recent posts and readings involving some extra acknowledgement that my moods are indeed quite sensitive, it occurred to me this morning, why not USE THAT in the morning?!? Eh?!? Use it FOR ME instead of AGAINST ME?!?
- So tomorrow, I’m going to get some happy music playing. Why not?
- This morning, I actually allowed myself to pull out a Calvin & Hobbs comic book.
I’m game to try most anything to turn these horrible, horrible, horrible, horrible mornings around. I’ll use meh sensitivities if this will help!
- Heck, I actually had an urge to pick up the guitar and start practicing (but it was too far away and too chilly out of the bed).
I really feel like I’m on to something with acknowledging that my moods are indeed quite sensitive. I remember asking one of my favorite counselors in the year post-College if she thought I was bipolar. She said no but that [insert something to the effect of my emotions are quite sensitive]. But I never knew if she was lying to me or not because she already knew that at that point, I planned on killing myself if I was bipolar or any of the other things then listed as “incurable”. I could handle the diagnosis now. I still 80% expect it, truthfully. But really, I feel like I’m getting closer to understanding something important. But then, maybe this feeling is part of mental illness. It’s certainly not the first time I’ve felt this way in my life. Like, on the verge of some kind of epiphany or something very important. But what if I really am? Or, what if it’s part of a sickness. lol 🙂